My New Shitbox

[Torque]

G'day all,

I'm an old ex member of AROCA (Squid driver from late 80's early 90's) and just having a troll.

Can I suggest that you build a reasonably solid grill to replace the standard one.  A grill that will resist unwanted intrusions.

Take some stockings with you.  They are good for many things. (I don't know you well enough to make any smart bottom comments here).  You can make fan belts out of them; they can tie doors/boots/bonnets down/closed; they make great air filters both engine intake and your fresh air vents (if no a/c you will want as much coolish air blowing on you as you can get, minus all the dust!).

Enjoy your trip, sounds like it should be great fun and for a great cause.

Torque

[MD]

Sheldon

I got a spare Alfetta manual which will do all your needs on the joolie and you can have it gratis. Just send me a PM with a mailing address. I also want to send you a cheque there too.

[Sheldon McIntosh]

Thanks MD, very much appreciated.  PM sent.

Not much progress on the little shitbox unfortunately, been busy with other things.  I can't work out how I'm going to get this V6 into Mario Speedwagon either, that sticky-out bit in the front will be poking through the radiator won't it?

[Sheldon McIntosh]

Torque - I think I recall seeing your name on some articles in the magazine, but I've only had the chance to look at a few of the old ones unfortunately.

Stockings sound like an excellent idea, I'll definitely take some.  Feel free to make smartarse comments, I'm sure most people would think I deserve them.  A solid grill you say?  I assume you're meaning unwanted intrusions of the mammalian variety?  Again something to watch for, thanks for that, good advice. 

Saw some more pics last week of some of the roads we'll be going on, after that I think I'm going to have to have a very good look at suspension components.  And take some spare shocks...

[Ray Pignataro]

I assume you're meaning unwanted intrusions of the mammalian variety?  Again something to watch for, thanks for that, good advice. 
Sheldon I need a little clarification is that mammalian or mammary. surely there could never be unwanted mammary intrusions?

[MD]

Sheldon,

I am not aware of what your accommodation arrangements are going to be but you did hint that you will be going via Brisbane. If that is so, I can put you and your co-driver up for the night and save you some bucks there. Just let me know with a bit of notice.

[branko.gt]

just to remind people that this is about fund-raising so stop talking and put some money forward:
this is a quote from one earlier post in this thread:

" Anway, the link to the fundraising site has finally come through, and here it is...
http://www.everydayhero.com.au/scuderia_shitbox

The site only accepts credit cards, but I'm getting some deposit slips sent to me if anyone is really keen to donate by cheque or cash.  Thanks for looking guys, and I'm extremely grateful for any and all donations. "

[Sheldon McIntosh]

I am not aware of what your accommodation arrangements are going to be but you did hint that you will be going via Brisbane. If that is so, I can put you and your co-driver up for the night and save you some bucks there. Just let me know with a bit of notice.

Hey Md, yes the rally heads off from Brisbane, Queen St I think is the start point.  I'll be driving the car up from Melbourne, so will probably aim to get there with a couple of days spare, just in case anything needs looking at.  Look forward to sharing a beer with you and checking out whatever projects you have on the go.  You guys got any club events planned for around that time (21st May is the start of the rally)?

Entrants have been getting regular newsletters keeping us informed of what's happening with the planning process.  In the June edition they included this little piece of information.....

Dodgiest car so far!
Some teams have already sorted out their team car. This is hugely enthusiastic, as you really do not need to do this just yet. Last year most teams sorted their cars out in the month before the rally and those that flew in from overseas sorted theirs the day before departure. There are plenty of options out there, though if you are going for something a little more classic/unusual you may need the time to hunt it down.
Anyhow, back to the dodgiest car so far. One of the teams listed to the right has made a very brave (there are other ways of putting it) purchase. As perfectly put by our chief mechanic 'Oh god- An Alfa Giulietta.................' Good luck with that one guys!

And in the latest edition, they've included a guide to purchasing your shitbox, which ends with this section....

Top 5 picks for cars to be avoided at all costs.
1. Anything with 'Alfa Romeo' on the badge.
Glorious engines, charismatic styling, everyone will want to stop and have a look at your car as you're sat at the side of the road, forlornly waiting for a Tow Truck. Rust, Rust, and more Rust is all you'll find at this end of the market. Oh, along with Mechanical heartache and temperamental, nay hideously unreliable electrics.
In the words of Jeremy Clarkson, 'Alfa Romeo design and build a car to be as good as a car can be.... Briefly.'
2. Daewoo 1.5i/Cielo
'Not a bad little car' I hear you say. 'Cheap, well maintained, yada yada yada', Oh, I'm sorry, I stopped listening at Daewoo. You just bought a time bomb. On these things, the engine Oil Pump is driven by a separate little chain, from the same Sprocket as the timing chain. Trouble is, this little chain falls off. Which means that
the engine starves of oil. Before you know what's going on, the engine oil light illuminates, and by the time you've pulled over to inspect the problem, it's already too late. Time for a new motor. Not a good choice.
3. Anything from a defunct British Car Maker.
Austin, Morris, Triumph, Rover, Wolseley, Humber, No, no, no, no, no. Too old, Parts will be a nightmare, and reliability will be a nightmare. Nice to look at in your shed and polish every second Sunday, but realistically, not a good bet to tear through the Red Centre in. Naturally, I bought a Rover.
4. Anything with a Citroen, Peugeot, Renault, or Saab badge on it.
Citroens and Peugeot's ride like a magic carpet. They offer superb comfort, almost like driving along in an old armchair. However, if you live more than two doors away from a dealer or specialist, or intend to take one any further than three doors away, they start to make less sense. Peugeot's (particularly the 504) can be mechanically invincible, but the part that breaks in the car park at Ayers Rock will be a part not even the Peugeot factory has kept for 30 years. Which usually means 'get your credit card out, this ones going to hurt'. Citroens are technologically fascinating, but not when you're trying to fix an overly complicated suspension system at the side of the road with zip ties and twine because you just ran over the bits of Skippy that a Kenworth driver didn't manage to plaster across his Bullbar.
5. Jaguars.
No. Just no.
Good luck and happy hunting!!


Pfft, we'll show them how reliable Alfas can be.  Eh guys.  Guys?

[Anthony Miller]

Ken Oath mate, I drove my Jooolie from Brizneeland to Melbyville and back 4 times in one year and it never missed a beat even with several bouts of 100mph therapy.

[MD]

Hey Sheldon,

Keep up the good work mate. If you want to know what's happening Club wise at the time of your visit, you may care to look up our web site :

http://www.aroca-qld.com/events_and_meetings.php

Club nights are on every second Wednesday so that's out which is a pitty as a visit there would spread the message further and we could pass the hat around too. Not to worry there will be other stuff we can get up to.

Now as for this bullshit about Alfas being unreliable. I cannot speak for post 1990 or for any front wheel drive stuff but I have owned Alfas from 1968 to 1990. I have flogged the arse off these things from Cairns to Adelaide and all places in between. I have incurred two potentail breakdown issues. Both related to water pumps. First pump on a Nord engine in a Berlina where the pump pulley parted company with the pump shaft and stopped turning the impeller. I nursed the car into the nearest town at around 4am and parked the car outside a boiler makers workshop. We spot welded the sucker back on the shaft and I finished my trip from Maryborough to Brisbane without a hitch.

The second episode involved my wife's 75 2.5 V6. A car that we recently purchased second hand which was a low mileage vehicle and fully serviced but still 20 years old. We decided to take it to Phillip Island. Around the NSW/Vic border, the pump started to weep a little. This is fair enough, it's the original pump and the seal obviously simply got tired hanging around for 20 years. I nursed the car into Melbourne where I had the pump replaced and returned to Brisbane after visiting the PI events without any further problems, It's a lovely machine.

Yes i have had stupid and silly little issues that I call irrelavant part break downs that are better described as a nuisance rarther than -leave you stranded - stuff. So to for me, I can honestly say that in driving Alfas for at least 3 decades, I have never been left stranded by my Alfa cars. Being stranded and immobile on the road side is what I call unreliable. I own a BA Ford service vehicle that I use in my business. It was put on the back of the RACQ tow truck 4 times in the last 3 months. It has 180,000 on the clock. About a year ago, it left me stranded on the highway, 100km out of Tamworth. Now  I call that unreliable. My Alfas have never done that.

Long story made short. I once bought a car for $60 in Melbourne and drove it to Brisbane and half way back to Bateman's Bay where a motorcycle cop killed the big ends by getting into my car to prove it had a noisey muffler so he could give me a ticket but he revved the motor so hard it crapped the bearings. This was a British car and not an Alfa. I had to catch a bus home the rest of the way back to Melbourne. This is to say you can have a shitbox last the distance as long as you dont abuse it.

I may have said it before but I will say it again for the sake of relaibility. When you finally drive the Giulietta on the road, avoid using big revs because old engines can run forever unless you give them heaps when all  their clearances are by now too much and the stresses break things big time. If you keep the revs under 4.5k and dont work the motor too hard by using tall gears when you should be changing down so the motor works in its good torque band, there will not be an issue relating to reliability.

Sheldon, I just wanted to say that much to give you some heart because the Giulietta is no better or worse than any other Alfa of its period and given some decent work over for maintenance issues, it is a good and reliable vehicle.

Cheers.

[Sheldon McIntosh]

No worries MD, I'm actually not concerned about reliabilty at all (bummer about keeping the revs down though - I reckon on the last day of the rally that little shitbox is going to get a hell of a flogging from me).  I've never had any real reliabilily problems with my Alfas, other than normal wear and tear (hoses mainly), and my own incompetent mods.  I just think it's hilarious that they keep mentioning it, makes it all the better to do the rally in this car, just to show 'em.  The car seems like it's all pretty simple stuff too (famous last words).

I can also understand it from their point of view.  This rally is about having a good time, and raising money.  The cars technically 'belong' to the rally organisers (since they get auctioned off at the end for charity), and they want as many as possible to get to the end, and to that end they help to fix anyones problems.  Looking at the footage of this years rally, it seems that most of the participants have absolutely no mechanical knowledge whatsoever, and people like that buying an old and neglected Alfa does not make for a reliable companion I would imagine.  I think most of us here would realise that when buying an old Alfa of indeterminate history, a few things will need to be looked at and remedied before driving it 4000km through the top-end.  Most people don't think like us, fortunately.

There is also that general perception that Alfas are unreliable.  Not a perception that we should try to change in my opinion.  A) May keep prices down a little, and B) It makes you look that much more windswept-and-interesting when you're prepared to drive an 'unreliable' car.

I'd looked at your club website, but there's no listings for next year yet.  I'll keep an eye on it, it would be cool if there was an event the week before, I could maybe come up early, I'm sure I can keep myself busy in Brisvegas for a week.  I'll keep an eye on the NSW calendar too, as I'll be stopping in Sydney on the way up.

[MD]

It makes you look that much more windswept-and-interesting when you're prepared to drive an 'unreliable' car.

Haahaa, I am starting to get the hang of it now mate. 

[Sheldon McIntosh]

Ha ha, that's the one MD!! 

I forgot to add this part before, this is their introduction to the car-buying guide, they really have a hang-up about Alfas.  All this is written by their chief-mechanic, who did the event this year in a Rover SD1, enough said really......

While putting together this list, I aim to cover all the basic bases of buying a vehicle that should hopefully have the mechanical robustness and reliability to cover the 8 days of the Shitbox Rally, and with a liberal dose of common sense, able to be simply repaired at the side of the road if need arises. However, I do like a laugh, so if you really, really want that Alfa Romeo that has been sat at the bottom of your street under a tree, please feel free to put in a reasonable offer!

Also thanks to people who've donated parts so far, MD, Anthony Miller, Mat Francis, Branko Turk, Hugh Harrison at Monza Motors, Bruno and Giancarlo at Maranello-Pursang, Barry Edmunds, and the person-who-shall-remain-nameless-for-now who is able to give me some parts from their company's "miscellaneous sponsorship" budget.  Apologies if I've forgotten anyone.  Hoping to get a couple of half-days off soon so I can park the car outside Maranello-Pursang to do the valve clearances.  "Bruno, how do I ........"

[redalfaracing]

Sheldon, I have just got back from a bit of a drive around Queensland, and happened to use some of the roads you will be taking. The relevant ones being between Gregory downs and the turn off to Kingfisher camp on the Savannah Way about 30 km west of Dommagee. This is the first bit of gravel you will use. Actually the roads are quite well looked after and really wont pose a problem to your speed wagon, unless it has been raining a lot. Since you are going in June, it is unlikely to be wet. I heard stories of the river crossings between Hells Gate and Booraloora. Some deep ruts in the crossings and some sand. However people are towing c/vans through so i'm guessing a heavy right foot will get you through alright. You need to look at every rock on the road and avoid them all. Not so hard to do and the reward is no punctures. We did 12000 k's around outback QLD in the 'lux and camper and managed to miss them all. I did see one dill who managed to shred a tyre in the Lawn Hill National Park... speed limit was 40 k's. Proves that if you hit the right rock no matter the speed, the air will come rushing out.
Sheldon, if you want some 2nd hand rally tyres i can give you some, but i only have 15 inch. With the stiff sidewalls they will fell much better on the gravel and be less prone to punctures.

Good luck, green with envy.

you will love the camp at Gregory Downs on the Gregory river. Been described as the best campsite in Australia. I might not go so far, but it is bloody good. Make sure you have a swim.

[Sheldon McIntosh]

Hi redalfaracing

Thanks for the info, that's really good to hear.  We're actually going in May, so I imagine it will be pretty dry.  I'm glad to hear that the drive will be somewhat (but not too much) of a challenge too, I was worried that they'd make it a bit easy.

I would LOOOVE some 2nd hand rally tyres.  I'll try to get some 15 inch wheels and will be in touch.  That will work out well actually, since I can put the 13 inch wheels that are on the car in the boot vertically, and have 5 spares.

Anyone got any (very) cheap 15" wheels going spare?

I'm hoping to get the car to Spettacolo in a couple of weeks, gotta try and find time to do the valve clearances and a rego.